America

In Ohio the following laws exist:

· if you ignore an orator on Decoration Day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speakers stand, you can be fined $25.

· it is illegal to get a fish drunk.

· it is illegal to hunt for whales on Sunday. (Surely it’s illegal to hunt whales full stop?)

In Alaska, the following laws apply to moose:

· a moose may not be viewed from an aeroplane.

· it is illegal to give alcoholic beverages to a moose.

· it is an offence to push a live moose out of a moving aeroplane.

In Texas the following laws apply:

· it is illegal to take more than three sips of beer whilst standing.

· the entire Encyclopaedia Britannica is also banned, as it contains a formula for making beer at home.

· a new anti crime law has been introduced, requiring criminals to give their intended victims 24 hour notice, either orally or in writing to explain the nature of the crime.

In Pennsylvania the following laws apply:

· Because of the farmers Anti-automobile society, these are some of the rules of the road:

· Automobiles travelling on country roads at night must send up an rocket every mile, then wait ten minutes for the road to clear.

· If a driver sees a team of horses, they are to pull to the side of the road, and cover their machine with a blanket or dust cover that has been painted to blend into the scenery.

· In the event that a horse refuses to pass a car on the road, the owner of the car must take their car apart and conceal the parts in nearby foliage.

In Alabama it is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.

In Jasper, Alabama, it is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.

In Arizona it is illegal for donkeys to sleep in bathtubs.

Also from Arizona, if a person is caught stealing soap, they must wash themselves until it is all used up.

In California, it is illegal to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

In L.A., it is an offence to lick a toad. Apparently, this is because people were getting high off them! (How!??)

In New England, fire engines are not allowed to exceed 25mph – strangely, this includes the journey to the fire!

In Devon (yes there is a place called Devon in the US), it is illegal to walk backwards after sunset.

In Hartford, it is considered an offense to cross the road on your hands.

In Cleveland it is illegal to drive whilst sitting on another persons lap.

In New Jersey you can be arrested for slurping soup in public.

Zoin city, Illinois, has a law that states that you cannot make faces at anyone.

A Kentucky law states that burglary can only be committed at night.

Fishing from the back of any animal is illegal in Idaho.

In Sheridan, Wyoming, a policeman can bite a barking dog, in order to quiet him.

Citizens in New York may not greet each other by putting ones thumb to the nose and wriggling the fingers.

When you pass a cow in Pine Island, Minnesota it is illegal not to tip your hat.

Georgia has a law prohibiting people from saying ‘oh boy’ in public.

In Atlanta its illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or lamppost.

In Hawaii it is illegal to insert pennies into your ear.

It is illegal in Idaho for a man to give his sweetheart a box of chocolates that weighs less than 50 pounds.

Women in Joliet, Illinois, can be arrested for trying on more than six dresses in one store.

In Chicago it is illegal to eat in an establishment that is on fire.

In Winnetka, Illinois, theatre managers can kick out any patron who has ‘odorous feet’.

In Lawrence, Kansas, it is forbidden for anyone to carry bees in their hat, whilst on the city streets.

In McLough, Kansas, it is against the law to wash your false teeth in a public drinking fountain.

In Natoma, Kansas, it is illegal to practise knife throwing at men wearing striped suits.

In Lexington, Kentucky, it is against the law to carry an ice cream cone in your pocket.

In Owensboro, Kentucky, it is illegal for a woman to buy a new hat without her husband trying it on first.

In Canton, Mississippi, it is illegal to kill a squirrel with a gun whilst in a courtroom.

Any city in Missouri can levy a tax to support a band, as long as the mayor plays piccolo and each band member can eat peas with a knife.

In Greene, New York, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards down a street, whilst a concert is on.

In North Carolina it is illegal to use elephants to plough cotton fields.

It’s illegal in Oklahoma to get a fish drunk.

In Seattle, goldfish can ride the city buses in bowls, but only if they keep still.

It is illegal in Maine to step out of a plane, whilst it is in flight.

In Florida, you can be fined to fall asleep under a hair dryer, and so can the salon owner.

Also in Florida, if an elephant is left tied to an parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid, just as it would be for a vehicle.

Again in Florida, it is illegal to have sexual relations with a porcupine.

In New York, you need a license to use a clothesline outdoors.

In Minnesota, you may not cross state lines with a duck on top of your head.

In Carmel, New York, it is illegal for a man to go outside if his jacket and trousers do not match.

In Baltimore, it is illegal to throw bales of hay out of a second storey window, within the city limits.

Also in Baltimore, it is illegal to take a lion to the movies.

The state of Washington has passed a law stating that it is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.

In Conneticut, for a pickle to be officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce.

In Bexley, Ohio, it is prohibited to install or use slot machines in outhouses.

In Harthahorne city, Oklahoma, it is unlawful to put any hypnotised person I an display window.

In Clawson, Michigan, there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his animals.

In Gary, Indiana, persons are prohibited from attending a movie theatre or riding an street car within four hours of eating garlic.

In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500ft of a pub, school or place of worship.

In Kentucky, no female is allowed to appear in a bathing suit on a highway unless she is escorted by at least two police officers, or armed with a club.

In Russel, Kansas, it is against the law to have an musical car horn.

It is illegal to hum in public on Sundays in Cicero, Illinois.

In Clinton county, Ohio, there is a fine for anyone caught leaning against an public building.

In Kenosha , Wisconsin it is illegal to have an erection in public. Even if you have clothes on.

In Kansas it is illegal to swim with a polka dotted bathing suit before 12:00 noon.

Britain

In London, Hackney taxis must carry a bale of hay and a sack of oats.

It is illegal to be drunk in a pub or club, or any other licensed premises.

Oddly, it is illegal to consume a mince pie on Christmas Day.

In Hereford, you may not shoot a Welsh person on Sunday with a longbow in the Cathedral Close.

However, in Chester you can only shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow inside the city walls and after midnight.

Also in York, excluding Sundays, it is apparently legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow.

In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless in public unless they are a clerk in a tropical fish store.

It is illegal for a Member of Parliament to enter the House of Commons wearing a full coat of armour.

Sleeping with a consort of the queen is classified as treason, and as such carries a maximum penalty of death.

Placing a postage stamp of the queen upside down, is also considered treason.

It is unlawful to impersonate an Chelsea pensioner.

It is illegal to sell most goods on a Sunday. It is however legal to sell a carrot. It is also legal to sell it at any price, and to give free gifts with it, such as anything else one might want to buy on a Sunday.

The following are legal though:

· a male may urinate in public, so long as it is on the rear wheel of his motor vehicle, and his right hand is on the vehicle.

· all English males over the age of 14 are to carry out approximately two hours of longbow practice a week, supervised by the local clergy.

Australia

It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and have black shoe polish on your face as these are the items of an cat burglar.

It is illegal to walk on the right hand side of the pavement.

Taxi cabs are required to carry a bale of hay in the trunk.

In Victoria, it is illegal to wear hot pink shorts after midday on a Sunday.

Canada

In Alberta, there is a city law that states that any person being released from prison must be given a handgun with bullets, and a horse so that they can ride out of town.

In British Colombia, it is illegal to kill a sasquatch.

In Hartland New Brunswick you are not aloud to make jokes about people with mustaches. Unless that person or persons first name begins with the letter “A” and last name begins with the letter “N”.

In Etobicoke, the bylaw states that ‘no more than 3.5 inches of water is allowed in a bathtub’.

Guelph, is an official ‘NO-PEE’ zone.

In Toronto, it is illegal to drag a dead horse down Yonge Street on a Sunday.

Denmark

Before starting your car, you are legally required to make an visual check to make sure there are no children underneath your car.

When driving, you must have someone in front of your car with a flag, to warn horse drawn carriages that a car is coming.

Scotland

It is illegal to be drunk and in possession of a cow.

For some crimes, you are presumed guilty until proven innocent.

Switzerland

It is illegal to flush the toilet after 10pm if you live in an apartment.

A man may not relieve himself while standing up, after 10pm.

Thailand

It is illegal to step on any of the nations currency.

It is illegal to leave the house if you are not wearing underwear. (How did they know?)

Indonesia

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